It is the beginning of 2020 and I'm looking over the financials. My household, the firm finances, and Mom's finances - I guess it is just that time of year. One of the biggest safeguards against self-dealing, or a fiduciary misappropriating funds, is the disclosure of information - particularly to beneficiaries. This is the reasoning … Continue reading First Year of Assisted Living Costs – Columbus, Ohio
I went and saw The Joker this weekend in theaters. I was aware of the reviews. It wasn't a film that I had planned to see, nor is it one I would watch again. It lacked a "feel good" moment. There is no hero, and frankly, it is sad. In spite of this, the movie … Continue reading The Joker – Powerful Depiction of Living with Mentally Ill Parent
In the wake of each of these tragedies, it has become a predictable play. It isn't even nuanced anymore, and it sure isn't interesting. Here is the recap - tell me I'm wrong. One side says, "WE NEED REFORM!" The other side says, "IT ISN'T THE GUNS' FAULT, IT IS THE CRAZY PEOPLE!" Then someone … Continue reading Taking apart the dialogue of the gun debate.
Another weekend passes and our country has had two more mass shootings. After each of these, I sit down and write Senator Robert Portman, to say, hey, we have a problem, what are we doing? This time, one of the shootings was in Ohio. I think I have had a single response - and it … Continue reading Meaningful Changes – Gun Control
My sisters and I have undertaken the cleanup of my mom's house. Increasingly, it is clear that it is not a good environment for her. Regardless of if Mom stays in a facility with a nursing staff or we move Mom into a condominium or an apartment, keeping her in a three bedroom, two and … Continue reading Working with Siblings
There is a lot of information out there on mental health, but so little of it seems to be talking to the person who is living the experience as the caregiver. I want to learn from someone who has situational empathy for what I'm experiencing, not a list of symptoms, but someone who knows what … Continue reading Educational Resources – Mental Health
My sisters have been in town helping me clean-out my mom's house. She never threw anything away, so she has three houses worth of stuff under her roof. It is ridiculous. During our time together, my sisters and I were kind of reminiscing over the journey with mom, childhood, and how we got to where … Continue reading If I Could Talk to Me, 15 years ago… Lessons Learned From Caring for a Mom with Bi-Polar Disorder
Last week I had to take Mom to one of her psychiatry appointments. Typically, the appointments should only take 10-15 minutes. Hers usually last the better part of 40-60 minutes. After the appointment I had to meet with the residential nursing staff at Mom's facility, update them on what the physician changed, the tests he … Continue reading Coordination of Care – Create a Form
I moved mom into an elderly retirement community with nursing care about three months ago. It was the best decision I have ever made for myself, and for her. She was probably calling me 30-40 times per week, now she is averaging 2-3. She has gone from being clinical for three months, to now stay … Continue reading Three Month Update – Caregiver
A guardianship is a legal action that is filed in the probate court. The issue for the court to decide is whether or not the person in question, the proposed ward, is in need of a guardian, and, if so, who should serve as the legal guardian? While these actions are common in cases of … Continue reading Guardianship – what is it?
We all deal with them. Folks who have zero compunction about lying. And, if you confront them about it, guess what? They'll lie more, blame you, or further complicate the matter. So what do you do? Document the file. And this can be done in a variety of ways. For lawyers, we document the file … Continue reading How to deal with liars
Fair question. The answer, very logical. A "durable" power of attorney must be printed on 40lb bond paper. No, that's not what makes it durable, I swear, this stuff is funny - to someone (okay, maybe just me). A Power of Attorney document is based entirely in agency law. Rule One of agency law - … Continue reading What makes a Power of Attorney “durable”?
The 1950's and 1960's saw the de-institutionalization of patients suffering from mental illness. Why is that? Well two things: 1) Due to the lack of institutional oversight, the institutions themselves were wrought with problems and cases of patients being abused; and 2) the Civil Rights Movement. A person diagnosed with a mental illness hasn't committed … Continue reading The Gap After Clinical Care
Whether it is at home, in litigation, or in a negotiation, there are moments in life where continuing to communicate will push you further from your goal. Knowing when to stop the communication requires some intuition and experience. A feel for whether you can convince the other side to "see the light." No matter how … Continue reading Knowing when to stop the dialogue.
I finally had the conversation with my mom that I had been fearing. Mom had been clinical from October until December - literally three months in a row. She'd have a month long hospitalization, then she'd be discharged. Within a week, she'd be pink slipped again. I just kind of kept my hands off the … Continue reading Finally had the conversation – you aren’t going home.